Monday, 9-21-09 (Day 6)
Dexamethasone (.75mg, oral pill): I think it's time to break out the Spanx.
Lupron (5units, subQ injection): My dose was officially cut in half today, dropped down to a mere 5 units. I don't feel as sleepy as I did during the last cycle, but my head has been aching since this morning and I refuse to put anything-even Tylenol-into my body unless I absolutely have to because I am that stubborn and determined to stay chemical free.
It's really too bad that my husband doesn't have the same mindset.
Ironically, as I ran outback to give him the vitamins he forgot to take this morning that are supposed to improve his sperm, I was shocked to find him lighting up a cigarette that was killing his sperm.
We are right smack in the middle of the IVF process, presumably necessary due to male factor issues, and my husband was found guilty of voluntarily harming his precious and necessary contribution by way of a nasty, disgusting, sperm murdering cancer stick.
I don't remember what I said to him; the situation is a bit of a blur caught up in smoke by my white hot anger and that ridiculous cigarette, but I can guarantee it wasn't very nice and he looked kind of scared.
I'm pretty sure I put the fear of God-or me-into him.
In his defense, my husband is not a "smoker", and I'm by no means concerned that he's been smoking behind my back for the last few months. I have the nose of a hound dog, and his knowledge of this sixth sense of mine keeps him in check for the most part. But back in his carefree younger days before me, he did carry on the male family tradition of casually smoking a few times a year because it just wasn't a big deal.
But that changed when he met me and my freakishly sensitive nose, and since then I've only caught him serving his nicotine fix a handful of times during our three years of wedded bliss, and usually only in the wake of a very stressful event for him. But today, disregarding our healthy living style and compromising the fertilization results of our possible pumpkin patch was just not acceptable, stress or no stress.
I'm going to need a large batch of God's grace to deal with this in a decent fashion that does not involve not speaking to my husband from now until the day I need his sperm extracted in order to make our children.
And possibly a burrito from Taco Bell.
Tuesday 9-22-09 (Day 7)
Dexamethasone (.75mg, oral pill): *Sigh*
Lupron (5units, subQ injection): I'm pretty much over yesterdays smoking extravaganza. The reality is that my husband is a good man. He puts up with so much from me and that's enough to drive anyone to nicotine I suppose. And after yesterday's ranting post, He immediately and sincerely apologized, showing immense apathy and regret for his actions, along with a what may have been a possible fear for his life.
I'll take it.
He may not be perfect, but he's perfect for me. Besides, everyone messes up, and I'm pretty sure that Taco Bell is just as toxic to my body as that puff of smokey goodness was to his anyway.
Wednesday, 9-23-09 (Day 8)
Dexamethasone (.75mg, oral pill): I broke down and stepped on the scale today, pleasantly surprised to find that I'm not doing too bad.
And then I remembered it's only been a week.
Lupron (5units, subQ injection): I wonder what it is about Wednesdays that brings me bruises. Just as my battle wound from that very first shot last week started to fade from black and blue to green and yellow, I've gained a new purple and gray one.
It's OK though, they're kind of pretty.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Monday, 9-21-09 (Day 6)
Posted by Tabitha at 10:24 AM