Big Shot

Thursday, 1-7-10 (Day 9)

Dexamethasone (.75mg, oral pill): My daily walk was cancelled today by the pouring rain and my mother-in-law, sister-in-law, and grandma-in-law coming into town. However, I did rush around the kitchen for about an hour preparing homemade potato soup, salad, and garlic french bread, so I'm hoping that counts under the category of brisk walking.

But then I ate a whole lot of it; so it probably doesn't count after all.

Lupron (5units, subQ injection): I spoke too soon about my lack of bruising.

As I injected my self today, my skin quickly turned the color of a dark, menacing shadow. By the time I finished brushing my teeth, the dark spot had expanded and became a deep purple blue around the outside edges while remaining pink and fleshy in the center. And by the time I made it to work, the area was covered in raised goose bump style spots with an even deeper maroon surrounding it all.

How did I get from absolutely no bruising to the ugliest bruise ever in less than twenty-four hours? And who do you know besides me that would proudly describe it in excruciating detail?

It's actually kind of pretty to be honest, and I'm slightly disappointed I can't share it with everyone. I guess that's pretty good though, if the absolute worst part about this secret cycle so far is not being able to proudly display the self inflicted battle wounds.

E2: Today was my baseline E2 blood draw, and the first time ever that my family full of medical professionals wasn't able to assist me with some black market blood work care.

It's OK though, because my favorite faux hawked phlebotomist was present and pleasant to work with today; he even gave me an envelope to take home in case the lab messes up again and bills me like they usually do every singe time I go to the lab, no matter how many times I point out that the lab slip specifically says to bill my doctor in Sacramento.

I wanted to let him know that what I was really looking for was an amazing E2 number to start with, followed by a nice high beta number in in a few more weeks. But instead, I politely accepted the prepaid postage envelope and sat in the squeaky chair as his assistant quickly drew my blood. As the needle made it's exit and I held the cotton ball on the pressure point, I prayed that I wouldn't develop a bruise large enough for people to notice and ask about.

Because the bruising on my stomach is easy to hide, but a ginormous bruise in the crook of my arm? That's going to take some serious creativity, especially for a hot blooded girl who wears sleeveless shirts in the dead of winter and can't seem to talk with out using large, animated hand gestures to conclude her stories.

So I walked out almost as quickly as I walked in, with a freshly formed dark spot on one arm and a prepaid postage envelope in the other, and smiled as the drama of it all started to rise to the surface.

Let the little white lies begin.

Friday, 1-8-10 (Day 10)

Dexamethasone (.75mg, oral pill): The rain was pouring down again today, so my brisk walk was cancelled once again. But this time I helped my almost sister-in-law set up for my almost-nephews birthday party until well after midnight, dancing and singing to Miranda Lambert, as I rolled Oreo cookie balls, salami-cream-cheese-peperchini appetizers, and stylish deviled eggs.

One for me, one for the tray.

Two for me, one for the tray.

I suppose It would be easier just to go the the gym, but this was way better.

Lupron (5units, subQ injection): Despite the ugly, menacing bruise on my right side, I was fearless in today's injection and everything went perfectly; so it looks like we've reverted back to the simplicity of a nice, smooth lupron injection once again.

E2: Results are in, and we've landed nicely at a cushioned 31.6.

This is very good news; last cycle I was at a a 33, and the cycle before that I was at a 67 a day later. I'm not sure of the exact number, but ideally they like to see the number below 50, so I'm satisfied, as is my nurse coordinator.

I can't believe how fast this happening; in just a few short days I'll no longer be shooting solo, my husband will help celebrate my twenty seventh birthday by resuming his duties and injecting stims, forcing my ageing ovaries to hopefully produce some high quality embryos before it's too late. But for now, everything is developing wonderfully; and despite my extra large dexamethasone pouch, bruised extremities and somewhat bipolar exercise habits, I'm at ease. I can say with full assurance that I'm happy, I'm excited, and I'm ready for whatever God has in store for us at the end of this cycle; whatever that may be.

But for the record, it feels like something big.

"Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight."

-Benjamin Franklin